Tuesday, October 19, 2021

Forever, ooh.

One of my favorite times in life was a Ministry Outreach team at Trevecca in 1987-88. It was my girlfriend Teresa my best friend Tim, Jerry, Belinda, Avis, Stephanie, Rhonda, Billy and some others from time to time. We worked played laughed prayed traveled together and had chances to do awesome stuff in local churches across the region.
We also did skits and songs and other things at those churches. One of the skits that I think was by Hicks and Cohagen was called Sunday School. In that skit two of the characters have an argument and one of them ends by saying forever! The kids watching say ooh!
Forever- ooh!
Well now I've been a pastor for 18 years. I've been married for 32 years. I've married a few dozen couples counseled others and seen hundreds of relationships go up and down and stop and start.
I've seen a lot of singles, couples marriages and formerly married people talk about how bad marriage is. My oldest child is getting married in about 50 days. As that happens I think again about how much I believe that marriage is not a sentence but a blessing.
Early in our marriage Teresa and I had regular  fights over stupid and serious things. Part of that was both of us being used to getting our way, working full time and going to graduate school full time, and part might have been natural energy and balance. We had an argument every other Saturday evening for months.
A very few times one of us would almost decide we were done. When that happened each time one of us- a different one at different times- would bring us back to what we knew. We knew we loved each other we knew that we believe God has put us together and we knew that we had made a commitment for life before God our families and our friends.
I have pastored individuals and couples through counseling through arguments and even a few times through divorce.
I do not believe that every marriage will succeed. I do not believe that every marriage is God's will. But I do believe in every lifelong relationship there comes a point where both parties decide whatever happens We are US, not you and me. It no longer becomes me and you or you and me but it is we. In the movie The Marrying Man, at a significant point in their relationship there was a chance for a couple to stay together or pursue individual dreams. He said this is best for both of us and she said don't go I Believe in Us. I think that discussion and some form happens in the hearts and minds of every couple.
For my wonderful son who married above and his wife, for my daughter Sarah and our adopt-a-man Paul, and everyone else, I would encourage all of us to make our decisions carefully and when we have decided to decide that we believe in US. Forever- Ooh! :)